It was good while it lasted...

25 days until 32 weeks

67 days until 38 weeks

Currently: 28 3/7 weeks

Well, work was good while it lasted, but unfortunately, it's not lasting any longer. My length dropped to 3-4mm, so home it is. They put me on the monitor and I had a few contractions, but nothing significant. 

Little Bean looked great today! He/she weighs in at 2 lbs 4 oz and had a heart rate of 144. On the monitor, the heart rate stayed around 145-155. Jon thought this picture looked like Kenzi today! 

So while I know we have a long way to go, I know this is what needs to happen. I gave work a chance and needed that for my own peace of mind and to know I tried...but it's not in the cards. Dr. McNamara is giving me two outings a week: my OB appointment and church. I'm grateful and thankful that I can go to church...I didn't get that chance with Kenzi. I've said this from the start...I prayed for years for a healthy baby. We can do this. This will alter our life for a while, but it is not forever...whatever needs to happen to have a healthy baby is what we'll do. Our faith and love will get us through all of this! 

Thank you for your continued prayers. We need them all! 

28 weeks

28 days until 32 weeks

70 days until 38 weeks

 

Currently: 28 weeks

 

Happy Valentine's Day!! We've made it to 28 weeks today!! We don't have a lot of news right now. I went to work Friday afternoon and things went well. I felt fine, didn't have any problems and it was nice to see everyone again. But that's part of the problem...I've felt fine (minus two days when we did the steroid shots), but overall, I can't tell if things are worse or not, which is part of the challenge!

 

I'm going to work again on Monday and then go back to the doctor on Tuesday. We'll see then if I can continue to work half days or not.

 

We have to send out a huge thank you to everyone who has brought meals over, stopped for a visit, cleaned up our kitchen, and my colleagues who sent a huge box of yarn! It warms our hearts to have such love and support from everyone! Until Tuesday...have a wonderful Valentine's Day!



Feeling relieved

I am feeling so relieved right now! I just got back from my appointment and everything is stable. Cervical length is holding steady around 6-7mm but still remains 'dynamic' in that it changes frequently in length. But stability is still stability and I will take it!! So we have a plan to go back to work for 4 hours on Friday and again on Monday. I will go back on Tuesday and as long as things stay stable and I am feeling fine, we stay on this plan. 

So today is a 'winning' day! A friend of mine emailed me and said good doesn’t seem appropriate and ok just is a terrible word so hopefully you feel like in most things you are winning not losing! So we're going to go with that! 

Prayers that thing continue on this path...stability and baby baking...we're almost to 28 weeks! 

27 weeks

Well...here we are at 27 weeks!!! Not a great picture, but whatever...it's certainly a baby bump! What a huge sigh of relief to have hit 27 weeks...everyday is a better day than the last! 

My wonderful husband and son picked out this bright, new sweatshirt for me when they were running errands this weekend! Spoiled mama! 

We've had an interesting weekend, as Kenzi started spiking a temp on Thursday. I went to pick her up from daycare and she was laying on the floor, snuggling with her blankie. As soon as I got downstairs, she started crying, so I knew something was up! Her temp stayed around 100-101 but she acted ok. Yesterday, she acted fine, was playful and happy. Last night...different story! She was up at least 6-7 times....with angry noises, not crying, not screaming, just angry and not happy. We finally got her some Motrin and she fell asleep around 3. So Jon took her to Acute Care and sure enough...double ear infection, which is what I thought! So she bought herself 10 days of antibiotics, so hopefully will be a happier girl and finally eat something, as she hasn't eaten much except for breakfasts! 

I go back in on Wednesday, so please say an extra prayer for stability and many more weeks of baby cooking! 

I did finish a couple of going home hats for little bean! I love when I find a new pattern to love! 

Day 7

38 days until 32 weeks

73 days until 37 weeks

 

Currently: 26 4/7 weeks

 

I had an appointment on Monday and everything is stable and staying steady, which is a blessing! We are almost to 27 weeks, which will be my first big sigh of relief. Dr. McNamara wants to keep everything the same and see if things are stable next week. If they are, then there is a possibility of going back to work for half-days and see if things stay stable. If they don't, then back home. At this point, I'd be happy with any return for any sort of hours! Three days a week, two days a week...anything! And at the same time, if being home is what needs to happen to keep this baby growing and staying put, then home it is. We take anything and everything we can to keep this baby cookin'!

 

Our little twinkle toes had a half-time performance last night! She spent most of her time crowd watching but certainly didn't miss her favorite dance moves!

 

 

Jackson also has his own dance moves, o one of his favorite dance songs (although hard to hear and much to his mother's dismay!). He is providing good entertainment for me when he gets home from school. It's a relief to when his smiling face walks through the door after school!

 

 

Until next week with the next update!

Day 5

41 days until 32 weeks

76 days until 37 weeks

 

Currently: 26 1/7 weeks

 

Well, I've been at this resting thing for 5 days now and am surviving. Making hats, watching Netflix, hanging out. I decided that I'm going to start watching some of the classic movies I can find on Netflix! So far, I've watched Good Morning, Vietnam and Breakfast at Tiffany's.

 

Little Bean continues to be a very active baby and one of the big blessings is getting to savor every kick, every movement and learning about this baby. The movements are miraculous. Everyone in the family has felt Little Bean and the smile on their face when they feel them is something to cherish. Those smiles keep me going during these long days. They are genuine smiles straight from their hearts. I adore them!

I got this devotional a few years ago called Jesus Calling by Sarah Young. When I first read it, I was completely amazed (and sometimes a little freaked out!) by how accurate it was for that day...how much it was just what I needed for that very day.  It was eerily spot on...a lot. So obviously, I've kept reading it over the past years. And once again, it has been spot on for what I need! Here is today's:

We are what seems like a mountain right now. If you look at the numbers and the goals, it seems overwhelming and too much. But if you step back, look at all of this as a whole, like Jesus does, it really isn't that huge of a mountain...not even a little. It is a small hill to get over in the grand scheme of life. And yes, while the days are long, the end seems forever away, they really aren't. I will even give My angels charge over you, to preserve you in all your ways. Our family has chosen to rely on God, on faith and on His timing to being Little Bean safely into this world. It's the only way that will work...so that's what we're going with. 

Thank you to each and every one of who have stopped by, called, text, FaceTimed...every interaction is very much appreciated! I can't even begin to explain how much they mean to me! From the bottom of my heart...thank you! Please keep the prayers coming! I have another Drs appointment tomorrow morning so please pray that everything is stable and there are no major problems! 

25 weeks

A friend left me a card today with this in it. It is what I need today. It's the exact reminder of what I need.

 

I'm perfectly imperfect. There's no one just like me, it's mind over matter, to be the best that I can be. As long as I keep going and to myself stay true, today will be the best day, no matter what I do.

 

I do not have a well-behaving, perfect cervix. My length is even less today, so the half-day plans have changed. They monitored me for a while and I was not having any significant contractions...maybe a few very tiny little blurps, but nothing that was "documentable." I'm going to start on Procardia, like I was on with Kenzi, just to be cautious and go from there. So yes, I am now on bedrest...at home. Whatever needs to happen to keep this little bean growing and inside.

 

They say that for every day you stay pregnant, it can decrease your NICU stay be 5 days. So every day is a blessing...a HUGE blessing! As I remember with Kenzi, goals are key...they are vital to get to what you want. Mind over matter. If you see it and can visualize it, it will happen. My goals are bold, yet simple:

 

1. No need to be hospitalized.

2. Have a term baby.

 

I have 81 days until I am 37 weeks, which they consider term. I want to say that I want short-term goals like two weeks...but 27 weeks isn't enough for me...I need 32 weeks for my first goal, which is 46 days...still a lot of days, but doable! I have to...there isn't an option. Healthy baby...that's what we need. In the grand scheme of this child's life, what is 46 days, or 81 days...a tiny blurp...in the grand scheme of life.

 

Please keep praying...prayers for a healthy baby, prayers for the best scenario possible, prayers for all of us!    

 

 

Update on Little Bean

Well, we've hit the 24 week mark with Little Bean! One week better than the last and so much to be thankful for...

24 weeks marks viability for this babe...three more weeks for a full sigh of relief for me, knowing the road would be long but not as worrisome! 

Three more weeks to pass the mark the time that I needed to go on bed rest with Kenzi. Every week after 27 is a gift in my mind! 

I had an appointment on Tuesday that changed the course a bit. My cervical length had been hanging around 35mm after I had my cerclage placed (it had been around 20mm at that time...my doc told me to think of it like a drawstring, when you pull everything together, things gets a little thicker.). Well, we went to start the ultrasound and my cervix was once again "dynamic" as the doctor put it. You could literally watch it go from 30s down to teens. Yes, I said teens....12mm to be exact. So the first restriction was placed of no outreach for work. Flying across the state to Rapid and up to Fargo is out, which was okay in my book, as I didn't want to be that far away, have something happen and have Jon that far away. So then yesterday afternoon, I felt off. Something just didn't feel right. So when it continued this morning, I went back in today and my "dynamic" cervix was now not being so dynamic and going back and forth, but just staying in the teens again. *sigh* So it was decided that I will do the same steroid shot that I did with Kenzi (betamethasone) today and tomorrow. Spend the next few days resting and then go back to work half-days until my next ultrasound. My cerclage is saving me from complete bedrest right now, as it is keeping the cervix closed, which is the job. (I had told Dr. Mac to tie things extra tight, so hopefully that'll be the trick!) We are going to take things one day at a time and see what happens.

Little Bean continues to grow and is certainly looking more like a baby on the pictures. When you start getting the 3D ultrasounds at 16 weeks, they don't look quite so adorable. Jackson has informed me numerous times that Little Bean is not very cute right now....until this last time around. I showed the kiddos the picture and Jackson said "Mom, his (yes he always says he...no, we do not know this babe's gender) nose looks like a real nose now and his cheeks are getting cuter!" They measured Little Bean at 1 lb 9 oz on Tuesday, so growing nicely at this point in time. And today's pictures showed the world's cutest little lips, wouldn't you say?!?


We have been in this spot before (although a few weeks earlier this time around) and I am confident that we can do this all again. I know there are people who are rolling their eyes and thinking, "If you've already been down this road once, why did you choose to do this again." I've heard some of the joking/sarcastic remarks of, "better make this your last baby so you don't have to put everyone else through this again."  I felt this way last time and I will continue to have the same thought process, which is this: while having preterm labor is not fun and not easy, it is not life threatening to me or to this baby. If I had extreme preeclampsia last time or something that put my life in danger or this baby's life in danger, we would have not done this again. I can do this again...I've done it before and can do it again.

I have prayed for more than 2 years that if God could not give us a healthy baby, then don't give us another chance at all and we will consider other options to expand our family, but God obviously has different plans for our family. This baby has been prayed over well before he/she was conceived. We prayerfully went into this knowing what could happen. We have taken out insurance policies to help if something were to happen and have been prepared for this. Having another baby in this family was not done half-hazardously, as some people may think. And no, I am not going to say that this is for sure our last baby, because I have a thing about permanently taking a person's fertility...I'm guessing it has something to do with having two aunts who passed away and when I think about that and what if something happened to myself or Jon and we found someone else to love and marry, I don't want to have made that permanent of a decision for their future. I don't want to intervene and make something permanent if that is not what God's plan is for us. Am I saying we will do this again...no Am I saying we won't...no...because that is not my decision, that is God's decision. So I am also graciously asking (in the nicest way possible) that if you hold the previous opinion, please keep it to yourself. If you cannot be supportive for us because you do not share the same opinion, then that is okay...just please don't share it with me or with anyone else either. It is not helpful for me to hear these things from anyone...it is stressful and heart wrenching for me to hear this and the last thing I need is more stress. We are bringing a life into this world. We are not doing this selfishly and without faith. We are doing this with full faith and I know that God's works is at hand.


What we need right now are a lot of prayers. Pray that cutting back on hours is all I need. Pray for this baby to grow and be healthy. Pray for Dr. McNamara as he makes decisions regarding this pregnancy. He is a phenomenal physician and I could not ask to be in any better hands than his. Pray for things to stabilize and not change. Pray for our entire family. Any prayers that you are willing to give, are greatly appreciated!

Please don't judge me...

Please don't judge me...this is hard for me to say to others. Because I fear that you will judge me for what I'm about to say. 

I don't worry about my kids. It's not worth it to me. 

Now that you've thought 'what is wrong with this mother?!? Who says that about their own children?' let me explain...I started doing an online bible study through Proverbs 31 called Am I Messing Up My Kids? by Lysa TerKeurst and as I read the chapter for today, I got all teared up...because it's exactly how I feel but fear that other moms would take it the wrong way...that I don't care about my kids...which isn't true.

My parenting philosophy started well before my kids were here...back to when Jon & I were engaged and I was working in the NICU. I had the privilege of taking care of this beautiful baby girl, Jentry. She was born with an omphalocele and I had her over a weekend. On Saturday, her parents, Carrie & Jeremy, came in to see her and get an update. As I'm updating them on how Jentry's night was and how her labs looked, Carrie turned to me and said, "We can't do this to her just because we want to be parents." And just like that, looking at these two most faithful people, my parenting philosophy changed completely. These two people showed me so much about parenting and faith, all in a few short hours. They showed me that while I love my children with all of my might, I can't control what happens to them....I can't control the plan that God has already made for them. I will protect them to the best of my ability, with all of my might...I will teach them to look both ways before crossing the street, talk to them about water safety, talk about stranger danger and will do everything I can to keep them safe.  I only send my children with people that I trust. If I don't trust them whole heartedly with my children's life, then I won't do it. It's part of doing my best to keep them safe...to the best of my ability. Because that is my job as their mother. So when I read this, it just hit home!

It's okay for us moms to be protective over our children and watch out for their well-being. That's one of the most important aspects of our job. But it's not okay for the fear of the unknown to paralyze us and stifle our kids in the process. The reality is that God has assigned a certain number of days to our children, and nothing we do or don't do will add to that number. 

It is exactly what I've been thinking and feeling, yet too scared to say outloud, for fear of being judged. I still struggle at times and it hasn't been an overnight, worry-free life. I struggled to let anyone else drive my kids, but with time and prayer, this has gotten easier. Because it has everything to do with trust...if I trust that person with all my heart, I will be ok if something happened to them in their care (well, not ok, but not angry). If I don't, then I won't send them. God knows how many days each of my precious children are needed here on this earth to fulfill His purpose. I can hope and pray it is long, but there is nothing I can do beyond that, so why worry?

So I'd like to leave you with this thought (also from this devotional and slightly modified but powerful): 

They are God's children. He gave them to us, and if He chooses, He might take them. But whether He leaves or takes them, we have to stand here today and say we love Him no matter what. We're not saying we love what He might allow to happen, but we must love God for who He is, not what He does. 

There is no greater earthly love than a parent's love for their children. Only God loves them more. And I can say that with all my heart, I put my children's lives into His loving hand and know He has a plan for them. So being an overprotective, can't let them out of my sight, helicopter-like mom doesn't honor that love and respect that I have for this God who loves me and choose me to be their mother...because I am exactly the mom that my children needed. And for that, I thank God! 

Happy sweet, sweet Birthday!!

Our Kenzington Jolee turned three...THREE!!! I can't believe it...three whole years ago that we went through this crazy summer to get that beautiful little girl brought healthily into this world! This sweet, sassy little girl had been such an amazing blessing to our family! She has taught us that anytime is a good time to dance, little girl hands turn any recipie into straight goodness and that there isn't another little girl who adores he big brother as much as her!! 

Kenzi had a spectacular birthday party!! She had fantastic friends and family here to celebrate with her. She was so adorable when she saw her birthday cake all completed! I turned around her cake and she goes, "Hi Dinder-wella" and smiled! Adorable!!

The other funny story:

So we're saying bedtime prayers at night and decided to say special prayers, rather than the typical bedtime prayers. So she's repeating along, saying our prayer:

"God, thank you for blessing our family with this little girl. You have blessed our day with great family, wonderful friends and spectacular weather." To which Kenzi repeats all in stride,, " great family, wonderful friends and opening presents." 

Happy sweet, sweet Birthdaym Kenzington Jolee!! We hope you loved your day as much as we do!! 

Back to her sassy little self!

Well, our little lady is back to her sassy little self! Everyone told me 10 days and I was hopeful it wouldn't take that long, but leave it to the experts...they were right! On Saturday, her entire persona changed! With a lot of Popsicles, Gatorade, fruit cups, and snuggles, we made it through the week. 

A quick story about our silly little girl. When we got to the hospital that morning and went to get her ready, they went to do her blood pressure. For those of you who have had it done...the machines they use get super uber tight, which Kenzi was not a fan of. Well, thanks to some Child Life knowledge, along with a mom who does BP checks on kids umpteen times a day, I told Kenzi to sing her ABCs while it was going and by the time she was done singing, it would be done. So when we got to recovery and got her settled down, they went to do her blood pressure and out sweet little Kenzi's tarted singing her ABCs. The nurse told us that as she was waking up and they did her BP, she had sang then as well and no one knew why! Even when we got to the Peds floor, she would sing until it was done! 

The big highlight of our week was the fact that Frozen came out on DVD. (And after watching Monster University at least 18 times last week, I'm ready for a new movie!) Let's just say that we've watched Frozen enough that Kenzi will quote the movie and both kids can sing most of the songs! Great musical with a great story. 

Long time no see!

Sooooo....I have to be honest. Life got so crazy that I forgot that I even had this blog!! It hadn't even dawned on me that I haven't posted since Kenzi was 15 months old...15 months! 

Fast forward the past year and Jack has started Kindergarten and loves every minute of it! Kenzi is a fun and feisty 2 1/2 year old who loves singing, dancing, puzzles and reading. 

A friend asked me if I was still blogging...and oops! Forgot about that!

So the biggest update is that Miss Kenzi is getting her tonsils and adenoids out tomorrow. Jack had this done but was a year older than Miss K. She'll be in overnight for observation so Mommy will stay with her at the Castle. Wish us luck. Say an extra prayer for all of us and her doctor. I'll let you know how tomorrow goes! 

What a week!

Yikes...what a week at the Burns house! Last Monday started with Kenzi's 15 month check up. Man oh man, I'm starting to wonder if this girl will ever tip the 20 lb mark!! She was only 19 lbs 3 oz. I guess the heavy whipping cream and Carnation Instant Breakfasts aren't doing the trick. On the flip side, I guess she's 60% for height! Who would have guessed that one?!?! Whenever I take Kenzi in, the nurses always do the hash at the head, hash at the feet and measure the marks on the paper. Not exactly accurate...coming from a clinic that puts all of the nurses through a competency evaluation regarding getting accurate heights and weights. So I did what I hate asking for...I asked that they get the length board out and do it that way. I held her head, we pulled her out straight and sure enough, the girl is 31" long! Jack hasn't ever been over 20% for anything, so I was very surprised to see that this was right! Three vaccines later and we were out the door.

Fast forward to Halloween..fun times by both Burns kiddos! I couldn't get a decent picture of these two kiddos if my life depended on it!


And then Thursday night came...I had practice for the contemporary band at church and came home around 8:30. Jon and I sat down to relax and then I heard it. The barking coming from Kenzi's room. That, my friends, is a cough indicative of croup. *sigh* So needless to say, neither Kenzi nor myself got any sleep that night. At 12:15, when she had been up 4 times, I threw her in bed with us...only to have her literally sleep on top of me. And she still woke up every hour barking away. So I headed to work on Friday morning to do clinic and Jon worked from home. We took both in to see Dr. Wallace and yup, it's croup. So one steroid shot later, we headed home. She did pretty good over the weekend, but still not awesome for sleep. She's on the mend and I'm hoping to catch up on some sleep soon!

And the funny of the week: Jack and his flu shot.

If any of you know Jack, he HATES shots. About as much as his mom does. He's been talking about his flu shot since last year. He's already worried about his next round of vaccines...which doesn't happen for another 5 or 6 years! So needless to say, when we told him he was going to get his flu shot, it didn't go over well. The nurse brings it in. Jack goes ballistic. Jon holds him on his lap, yet the tears continue. Our nurse gives it and Jack announces (in between sobs) "That didn't even hurt a little bit!" Good deal...so maybe we won't have a fit about it next year!

I am a Mother of Angels.

Two and a half years ago, to the date exactly, we found out that we had lost our baby. It was my second pregnancy and we were thrilled when we found out. Jackson was 2 1/2 years old and anxious for a sibling. I had planned an entire life for this small being inside of me. And then, on April 15th, we found out that life was gone.

 

I had started spotting...something I hadn't done in my first pregnancy. My regular doctor wasn't in clinic that day so I saw a different doctor, who had to give us the news that I had miscarried this baby. I knew it by the look on the sonographer's face, by the way she measured everything else, rather than looking for a heart beat. I just knew...and my heart was broken. I didn't want to have a D&C. It felt inhumane to me. It felt wrong to me, even though the baby was no longer alive. So I decided to wait. I decided to just let nature take it's course instead...until the bleeding didn't stop. And I ended up in the ER, dizzy from losing so much blood, pale and scared. I'll never forget being wheeled back to the OR. Jon holding my hand as long as he possibly could...the tears rolling down my face as the anesthesiologist put the mask over my face...and the wonderful person who wiped those tears away. Those are things that I will never forget. We decided that even though we didn't know if this baby was a boy or a girl, but we knew one thing for sure and that this baby needed a name. Mac Riley

Fast forward a few more months and I was pregnant again. They measured HCG levels, they checked progesterone levels, both of which were low. It was almost inevitable, but we were hopeful. Would we get to keep this baby? Would this baby join our family? Or would we have another heart break again. August 18th...we had an early ultrasound scheduled due to my last miscarriage. I laid down and the scan started...and ended with "I'm sorry. I'm just not seeing what we're looking for." At least this time, the sonographer had enough strength to tell us rather than tell us to wait for the doctor. So we went downstairs to meet my new OB. (I had previously seen family practice and because of the first miscarriage, my doctor wanted to refer me onto a specialist). What a way to meet someone new...going over options. Except this time, I didn't really have time to let nature take it's course. Jack's third birthday was on Saturday and we had family coming to town. So instead, I opted for the D&C this time. Same story...different day. The anesthesiologist said that he could see by the look on my face that I wasn't coming for an elective procedure. Nope, not really. And the same thing...exactly 4 months later, going under anesthesia, tears rolling down my face, losing another baby...losing another life. Mady Lou

For a long time, we didn't tell anyone. Please don't be offended if you didn't know about this. It wasn't about that in any way. There were only a few people who knew that I had miscarried. Not even our parents knew. I didn't want to broadcast it to the world. I didn't want the whole world to know that we were trying to have another baby. I didn't want everyone to ask questions non-stop or assume things if I didn't have a glass of wine that day, I was pregnant. I didn't want any of it. I just wanted my husband. We leaned on each other, rather than having our parent swoop in to take care of us. And that was exactly what I needed. It took me a while to figure out why I didn't want anyone to know, why I didn't want our parents to know. And then I realized it was because I wanted my husband...and I didn't want to hurt their feelings by pushing them away and telling them that we didn't need them. I knew that it would be hurtful...I mean, I'd be hurt if my daughter told me she just wanted her husband and not her mom. We will always need them, but this was different. It was the hardest time in our lives, but it brought us back to a place that we hadn't been to in a long time. And then in November, when we hadn't been tracking cycles or actually "trying" I got pregnant with our daughter. And the last six months were a new part of our past.

As time went on, I realized that it didn't need to be a secret. I didn't need to not talk about it. And the more people I shared it with, the more people came out with their own stories. And that's what October 15th is all about. It's about sharing your pain, sharing your life, sharing your experience.  

 

I am a mother of two precious angels. I can't wait for the day to know if they were boys or girls. And someday I will. It's hard not knowing right now. But God has plans for everything and he had a reason for this. He always does.

So today, I'm choosing to remember Mac and Mady and what they gave us in their short time with our family.

Critical Thinking 101

Q: If you were driving in the car, didn't have sunglasses, needed to take a nap, but the sun was in your face, what would you do?

 

 

A: You wear your new tiger mask you got on your zoo trip.

 

A+ for critical thinking skills, Jackson!

Jackson, 0 Car Mirror, 1

 

 In the game of life, you don't get 10 points for taking out car mirrors...although Jack thought maybe he could!

 

  Yup, Jack had a run-in with a side car mirror today. He was trying to get around Jon in the parking lot today, squeezed his way around and darn it, he's just the right height to smack right into a car mirror and cause some damage! So a trip to Acute Care, some DermaBond glue and a few tears later, we were done!

 

Nothing a little Cherry Berry won't fix though!

 

Two 'boy' injuries in 5 years isn't so bad!

Phew...

We had our very first parent/teacher conferences this week. And I'm not gonna lie...I was nervous! While we haven't heard anything from his teacher, there have been no trips to the principal's office, nothing that screams Jack is having problems...I was still nervous! Who knows what will come out of the mouth of his teacher. Jack has had some new behaviors that have come out and we have no idea where they are coming from...so needless to say, I was nervous!

Jackson told Jon that his teacher would probably say a lot of good things and only a couple bad things...and he was right! Mostly good...a couple things to work on, which is no surprise. Jackson can certainly be an 'in your face' kind of friend...which doesn't always go over well with others! It's certainly something to work on, and it'll take some time. But if that's one of the only things, it's pretty minor and I'm okay with that!

So huge sigh of relief as we walked out, knowing that we're doing something right. Onto the rest of the semester!

Alrighty then...

So tonight, Jack was in a bit of trouble for not eating quickly (I know...some of you are thinking, how fast does a kid need to eat?) Well, we were hitting almost 45 minutes and even Kenzi was done eating! Because he had been reminded so many times to eat more quickly so we could go on a walk and failed to do so, he lost the privilege of going for a walk.

Well...this makes for a really sad Jack! So I'm doing dishes and I look over, and he was sitting in our window sill. When he saw that I noticed him, he shut the curtain and announced "I'm just very upset and want to be by myself." Alright then, hang out by yourself! I went outside and snapped this picture. It's hard to see, but it's Jack, sitting in the window sill by himself, pouting. When he caught me taking a picture, he said "I just want to be alone. I don't want anyone to look at me. I don't want anyone to talk to me. I just want to be by myself!" And he promptly walked up to his room and shut his door.

I guess he figured out one coping mechanism!

Would you save a life?

 

So I have a question for you...if you could save someone's life today, right now, would you??

 

Today, I did something for myself. Something that I've thought about for a while, prayed about even more and finally had the opportunity to accomplish.

 

I registered to become a bone marrow donor.

 

Why?

 

There's a few different reasons.

 

For one, I'm an organ donor on my license, but what does that really mean...it means that I have to die in order to save someone's life. And if I am able to donate anything, I want to donate it all. If I can save someone's life, then I want that opportunity. But what about right now. What about today. Why not save someone today, if I could. 

 

Which comes to my next reason....Kenzi. Many of you are probably wondering how our 13 month old daughter made me decide to do this. And it's because we potentially could have needed this. Now, I completely and utterly understand that Kenzi was never truly at risk for leukemia and only had one out of the many symptoms of this, BUT it was a possibility. Her story COULD have been very different! When Kenzi had a suppression of her neutrophils, one of the things that was a possibility was a disease called Myelodysplastic Syndrome (MDS) and it's basically pre-leukemia. I thank God every single day, that Kenzi's blood count problem was related to a viral illness, but also know first hand what our life could be like if she would have had MDS. I work at the pediatric clinic and one of our patients has this. And she needed a bone marrow transplant to cure it. The past few weeks at work, there have been e-mails going about a bone marrow donor drive. One of our physicians at Sanford has MDS and has relapsed. He needs a bone marrow transplant and doesn't have any living relatives who are a match. So he needs to use a non-related living donor for his transplant and they are trying to find a match for him on the donor list. After reading that e-mail and seeing our patient, it hit home that we could have been that family...needing a bone marrow transplant for Kenzi and what if no one in our family was a match for her. We would need this list for our baby girl to survive. And while we are not in that situation, someone...a lot of someones actually, are in that situation. Needing a bone marrow transplant and desperately trying to find a match to save their life. 

 

 

So here I am...a now registered member of the National Marrow Donor Program. And I am proud.

 

Who knows if I will ever get the chance to give someone life, but if I'm needed...I'll be there. Because my girl may have needed it...someone's daughter, son, husband, cousin, niece, uncle or brother may need it...and maybe, just maybe, I could be that someone! 

Do we have a future bookie on our hands??

So maybe, just maybe Jackson has more insight to things than we think he does! Or maybe it's just that he's not devoted as much as his parents are...

It's a well known fact that Daddy is a huge Hawkeyes fan and Mommy is a large Huskers fan. With both teams playing yesterday, we were both hopeful for a win.

Jack woke up from his nap and the Hawkeyes were on. He walked down the stairs, watched the game for about 2 minutes and announced that the white team (ISU) was going to win...much to his father's disapproving look! Jon asked him why. Jack's response: "They're just playing better, Dad." Well, okay then!

Fast forward a few hours and the Huskers were on after supper. Once again, Jack had been upstairs taking a bath while I was watching the game. He comes downstairs, again watched the game for a few minutes and said, "Wow, that blue team is really good. Looks like they're gonna win." And they did...

Guess we should head to Vegas or something!